ALAN EASON — We in the church are witnessing the effects of several generations where “rebuking” has been out of style.  In our schools, teachers are overly cautious about rebuking children who misbehave. If they do, there is a mountain of paperwork involved. Pass/Fail seems to many to be much ‘kinder’ and almost no one fails any more, anyway.

In the workplace, there is also a lot of paperwork required to pad a rebuke of any kind. Everyone has to cover themselves completely to prevent severe legal problems if a “rebuke” is not coated with a lot of background explanation.

In our communities, and amplified in our public media and across our vast public square, people are severely chastised if they dare issue a verbal rebuke, however slight, that in any way could be applied or misapplied to someone feeling entitled to a free pass. Charges of  “bigot,” “racist,” “___phobe,” (prefixes are multiplying quickly), and other epithets are thrown at anyone who dares attempt to rebuke, reprimand, or even comment upon something that just seems — well — wrong.  Worst of all one can be labeled (with no apparent backlash) an old, white [Christian] male. (I accept it.)

Often the backlash has nothing to do with the action rebuked. Yes, I am talking about rebuking actions and ideas, not people, here.  You can rebuke a shoplifting incident that is glamorized in the media and you get backlash because the shoplifter was from a certain community, or of a certain race, or a certain gender, or perhaps recently switched genders (or even their race?) Yes, I digress. But I don’t believe I am overstating the digression of things going on around us.

The apostle Paul told the young preacher Timothy to be faithful in teaching God’s message, whether the timing seemed good or not. He used three extremely potent words in the Greek language to explain how to teach people.  1) λέγχω – rebuke or expose, 2) ἐπιτιμάω – rebuke, chide, admonish, warn 3)παρακαλέω – summon, admonish, comfort.

… proclaim the message; be persistent whether the time is favorable or unfavorable; convince, rebuke, and encourage, with the utmost patience in teaching. (2 Timothy 4:2)

Many who preach in the modern church seem to feel only the third method is valid. We love that warm and fuzzy word PARAKALEO. It is a great word, one I also take solace in. It is the word we get “The Comforter” from. But it is only 1/3 of Paul’s recipe. The other two words are much sterner and also very necessary. And, I would suggest, one pays a much higher price in applying them in teaching.

Now, in fairness to the text, we must do it with patience. It says that. But we must do it. And that takes a lot of spine these days.

I grew up in a generation and in a town where the ‘village’ did feel responsible for raising the kids. At times I was publicly rebuked by people I didn’t even know (they may have known my parents) with such words as: “Young man, you need to straighten up your behavior!” and such.

Yes, it hurt. And it held me accountable, especially when away from the house.  I needed it and deserved it. I had teachers who scolded me and rebuked me and even one high school chemistry teacher who flunked me one quarter. It really stung. It prompted my dad to buy me a slide rule and teach me how to use it to solve redox reactions quickly (I am that old). Did I like it? No. But my parents were glad we had people who cared enough to talk straight to me. And, looking back, I am very grateful.

In the mid 1990’s I came across some boys smashing glass bottles with their skateboards in the parking lot next to my office (it was a Sunday afternoon and few cars were there).  It was already out of vogue to correct kids in public, but — you guessed it — I rebuked them. I was as kind as I could be but also as blunt as I could be. I painted the whole dramatic picture: Pierced shoe soles, cut tires, blowouts on the Interstate. They retired to a corner of the lot and laughed at me. Then I went into my office, came out with a broom and started sweeping up the glass. Soon they were there next to me.

“Mister, give me the broom. And we’re sorry. We really are.”

What a thrill. Now, years later, I sometimes think about those boys, wonder where they are, and say a prayer for them — and their kids. I like to think I helped steer them aright, maybe just a bit. And I paid back some of the debt I owe to those who had done the same for me.

As the church, we live in the midst of “a crooked and perverse generation,” as the apostle described his world. It is true that we must love people desperately. But the church must learn once again how to rebuke, and to do so powerfully and effectively. Many will dislike us. Jesus said it, they will hate us like they hated the prophets who went before us. And those guys were not known for holding back their words, often sharp ones. They loved their people, even as God loves his people. And they loved them enough to tell it straight — and to suffer the consequences of being that honest.

“Well meant are the wounds a friend inflicts, but profuse are the kisses of an enemy.” (Proverbs 27:6)