We all try our best to hold it together during difficult moments in our lives. We try to keep our sanity and put on our game face to show others a false strength. The real truth is that so many of us are walking around heavy-hearted and broken. We carry hurts from our past, harbor low self-esteem and live with many insecurities. We live beneath our potential because we lack the fight in us to push past the challenges of life. We have allowed others to chisel at us, breaking away parts that we never took back. We fill in the gaps with material things and unsettling relationships to provide temporary satisfaction. We are soon reminded that we have chunks of us gone and we are not whole.

Admit Our Brokenness

How do we recover what was lost or just taken from us? First, admit the brokenness. We cannot expect to heal when we do not realize we are sick. Yes, it hurt and was possibly even traumatic, but we cannot sweep it under the rug as if it will disappear. Just the thought of it may cause anxiety, but if we do not confront it, it will control us. Those missing pieces have reshaped our lives. 

We have compensated for the loss in other areas. The brokenness caused some of us to operate from a place of bitterness, resentment, and anger. The past pain not only hinders our ability to enjoy wholesome relationships but often drives some into meaningless relationships that cause additional hurt. If we do not own up to it and acknowledge the brokenness, it will forever drive our lives down roads of unfulfillment and dissatisfaction.

Be Open and Willing to Forgive

We must be open and willing to forgive. Although it is difficult to forgive someone that has placed deep and lasting scars in our lives, it is very necessary for us to heal. No one wants to resurface that which has stripped us of our dignity and self-worth, but in order to heal, we must face what has caused us the pain. Forgiveness is what helps to release that which we have held on to. It does not diminish the impact of the events that caused it. Forgiveness positions us to be free from within. It gives us a position to receive divine healing from the Master Himself, for if we do not forgive others, we cannot be forgiven (Matthew 6:15).

Exercise a New Faith

Next, we must exercise a new faith. To be broken hurts. It is not easy to hold your head up and walk with confidence when you are broken. Healing comes when we are willing to get up from the place of despair and move forward, even when we do not see what is in front of us. A new faith is doing something different than what was done in the past. We must have faith that believes God has something better in store for us. God brings us to a place of healing because He wants to develop the purpose He placed in us. 

The new faith allows us to rise above the obstacles and gives us the strength to leap over life’s hurdles. The new faith is a faith that understands that we are not walking alone, but we can draw from God’s strength. We can depend on Him to glue every shattered piece back together with His unconditional love. Faith is believing even though we cannot see it. We are not believing in ourselves, but in a God that is for us and not against us.

He is a Big God

If your brokenness has brought you to low places in your life and you feel hopeless or helpless, you are not alone. So many of us have been in these dark and lonely places, but we yielded to God and received His grace and mercy to get us through. Yes, there are challenges, but He is a big God, and He knows how to fix them. He knows how to restore. He can bring your life back together no matter how shattered the pieces are. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean to your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Janet Boynes founded Janet Boynes Ministries in Maple Grove, Minnesota, in 2006. She authored the books Called Out: A Former Lesbian’s Discovery of Freedom, God & Sexuality, and her latest: God & The LGBT Community. Janet is an ordained minister under the Assemblies of God and travels the U.S. and overseas sharing a message of redemption and hope through the power of Jesus Christ.