Dear Karis,

It has been a pleasure to raise you. We admire all that you’ve accomplished. We are delighted that you follow Jesus. As you begin this new chapter,

Remember

Stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls. (Jeremiah 6:16)

What we’ve taught you, and what you’ve learned at church, is trustworthy. The ancient paths provide guardrails to secure your greatest happiness in this world. All Scriptural prohibitions are designed to enhance, promote, and maximize our joy in this life and in the one to come.

Just as you have been doing, continue to develop habits for this new environment, habits that will become instincts: Getting enough rest, eating well, exercising, going to church, and starting your day with God. You won’t always feel like doing the right thing. But doing the right thing always leads to feeling better. You’ve surely noticed that already. Dying to yourself in the moment is the path to resurrection, and lasting and greater joy.

Pursue

Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might. (Ecclesiastes 9:10)

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. (Colossians 3:23-24)

I hardly need to tell you to work hard. You’ve accomplished far more in your first 18 years than your mother and I did in ours. That said, a greater challenge awaits.

Hillsdale College will be hard, and you’ll be surrounded by people as smart as you, if not smarter. Don’t let it bother you if success comes more easily for some of your classmates. A rising tide lifts all boats. If you are willing to learn from the example of others, their accomplishments can spur you on to greater heights. Don’t measure yourself by comparison to others. Strive, rather, with God’s help, to be the best version of yourself.

Enjoy

You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. (Psalm 16:11)

The joy is in the journey, and also in the destination. The destination is Heaven, but eternal life begins now:

And this is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent (John 17:3).

We were made to behold everlasting beauty in the Triune God. Jesus died and rose again so that we could join that perfect fellowship that never began and will never end.

See more of God in the beauty of music, of math, and of literature. May all your learning be driven by a desire to better relate with God and display His wonders to others.

Love

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 Corinthians 13:4–7)

And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. (1 Thessalonians 5:14)

You can do all of the above by yourself. But God created you to be in community ( whether you want to be in a given moment or not). That doesn’t mean you have to participate in every late-night chit-chat in the halls or attend every party with loud pop music, but prioritize friends just like you prioritize exercise or hygiene. You need others, and they need you.

Look for ways to bless others. It could be as simple as smiling at your roommate in the morning, or taking 30 minutes to listen as someone vents. It might be serving, like taking notes in class or bringing food from the cafeteria for a sick hallmate. Look for opportunities. Ask God to help you see them.

God will richly reward and bless you as you invest in the lives of others.

Your mother and I both loved you even when you were in her womb. We will love you until the day we die. It’s an enormous privilege, honor, and delight to be your parents. Our relationship will change; our love for you never will.

Thank you,

Mom and Dad

Alex Chediak (Ph.D., U.C. Berkeley) is a professor and the author of Thriving at College (Tyndale House, 2011), a roadmap for how students can best navigate the challenges of their university years. His latest book is Beating the College Debt Trap. Learn more about him at www.alexchediak.com or follow him on Twitter (@chediak).